INITIATION

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    Just allowing yourself to get grounded into

    your body and into your breath, and into this

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    moment with a sense of gratitude for whatever

    force in your life brought you here.

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    The color I'm seeing for this month is violet,

    and that makes the theme of the month, I think,

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    really focused on our spiritual energy.

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    If I had to put a word to the theme of the

    month for April, it would be initiation.

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    Initiation.

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    With violet, there's this mistiness and this

    mystery and this sense of the unknown, and

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    with any initiation in life we go through,

    there's also a sense of going into that as

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    well.

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    You know the big initiations that we have

    throughout the span of lives is: birth, graduations,

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    marriages, divorces, retirement, giving birth,

    changing career paths, death...

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    there's also initiations into the mystery

    schools and initiations in the hidden realms,

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    and initiations into our own practices that

    we bring forward.

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    I myself have gone through many many initiations

    and the energy of initiation is something

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    that I can really really speak to because

    I'm very experienced with it.

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    I'm not going to get into my whole story,

    because you can read it in my bio on my website,

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    but I want to talk more about the sort of

    feeling of initiation.

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    You know there's something inside of us that

    we're always preparing for.

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    We're always preparing for something.

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    We're always preparing for our new way, or

    the new phase or time that is to come, and

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    when it comes the right time, when we've worked

    hard enough, when we've prepared enough, when

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    we've purified ourselves enough, when we've

    cleansed enough, when we've faced ourselves

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    enough, when we've faced our fears enough,

    this is the moment when we sort of stand at

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    the entry way into the portal of initiation

    into whatever it is that we're stepping into,

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    going into next.

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    That feeling of working so hard toward something

    and preparing for something and then standing

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    at the entry point about to ... it to be about

    to happen, is so nerve-wracking and scary

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    and also wrought with a lot of test -- you

    know -- a lot of obstacles for us to overcome.

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    And we know, we can almost sense and feel

    those obstacles, and in some ways, we feel

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    like, well, what would happen if I were to

    go backwards?

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    Do I have to do this initiation because I

    was really comfortable in this place that

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    I was in?

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    But there's something inside of us that pulls

    us forward and says, no no, it's time.

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    Do the initiation.

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    So, we cross the threshold and we enter into

    this place of initiation, and then we're met

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    with at least three really really powerful

    tests.

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    Tests that will make us want to give up.

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    Tests that will make us doubt and question

    ourselves and question our intentions.

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    Even tests that will make any movement forward

    or any continuation of the initiation process

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    seem futile, and maybe even bring us a sense

    of hopelessness, but then there's something

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    inside of us that gives us the courage to

    continue.

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    There's something inside of us that gives

    us the courage to move forward and move on,

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    and we stand up to every test, and we find

    this place inside of us that is so still and

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    silent and so sacred -- sacred as in meaning

    set aside -- and sacred also as in meaning

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    holy, right?Like we go into our inner kingdom,

    our inner holy place.

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    We go into that place.

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    Then all of these tests that are around us

    and that are coming through in this initiation,

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    they don't seem so intense because we've found

    that kind of still anchor within us to be

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    able to move forward.

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    Then, what we're doing as we're stepping up

    to these tests and we're moving from one test

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    to another -- I mean there's at least 3, if

    not 7, if not 13 tests within any initiation

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    process, right?

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    Like the 3 trimesters of pregnancy for example...

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    When we move through them and when we overcome

    the challenges presented to us, what we're

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    doing is building confidence in ourselves,

    and confidence maybe also in life and the

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    cycles of life and the rhythms of life in

    general.

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    We come out on the other side and we feel

    so strong and we feel so ready for anything

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    that is to come... and later on when there

    are challenging energies around us, we know

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    how to handle those energies because of the

    initiation that we went through.

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    So, whatever initiation that we go through,

    whether it's as an individual, with our spiritual

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    process, or it's just that part of being human

    and living life, or if we go through initiations

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    as a collective, every initiation that we

    go through provides us with a certain kind

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    of shield -- like a layer of protection, the

    like bull's horns... it gives us a sort of

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    sense of stability within us and this feeling

    of, 'because of everything that I've been

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    through and everything I've overcome, I know

    that I can handle anything that is to come.'

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    Resilience, you know, initiation gives us

    a really strong sense of resilience.

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    It's this place for us to go back to, and

    there's so much happening within the unseen

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    realms, and many many people try to define

    and put words and explanations to what's happening

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    with the unseen realms because they're uncomfortable

    with mystery and a little bit stuck in masculine

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    paradigms, so there's a lot of labels for

    different dimensions within the unseen realms

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    or different spiritual histories that we have,

    and I don't pay too too much attention to

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    labeling and identifying things because I

    love the mystery and my work here is to create

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    that balance between the masculine and the

    feminine and bring back a little more of the

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    feminine's embrace of mystery, but what I

    can tell you is that there's so much happening

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    in the unseen realms and there's a lot of

    challenges that we face even as we lie down

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    and go to sleep at night and go into our dreaming

    self and come a little bit out of our third

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    dimensional perceptions, and when we are in

    this place of having gone through spiritual

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    initiations, the challenges that we face on

    the spiritual realm -- and usually always

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    when we're facing challenges on a spiritual

    plane, a spiritual level, they're also happening

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    within 3-d and physical life -- but as initiate

    when you're challenged in this spiritual way

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    -- maybe there's bothering spirits around

    or harmful energies going after really innocent

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    energies (there's so much that can happen

    -- you know as an initiate that not only can

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    you stand up to it, can you handle this energy,

    but also you kind of have a responsibility

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    to stand up to these things and to work through

    these things and to, essentially, battle your

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    own inner demons in order to create that sense

    of harmony and balance in our collective,

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    around us.

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    So, I think it's important to acknowledge

    and understand the initiations that maybe

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    you are going through right now.

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    What are you leaving behind and what are you

    stepping into?

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    It's also the energy of spring, right?

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    The energy of new beginnings, stepping into

    the new way.

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    Every flower that blooms has gone through

    the initiation of coming from the seed, busting

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    through the ground, and having the courage

    to bloom.

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    Earth gives us this really amazing example

    of initiation as well.

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    What are you leaving behind?

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    What are you coming from and what are you

    going into?

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    What are you becoming?

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    And also, what do you have the courage to

    stand up to now?

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    What do you have the courage to face now?

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    What are the things that this new spiritual

    perspective, this violet light, this new spiritual

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    way, this initiation -- what has it shown

    you?

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    What has it taught you?

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    How does that prepare you for future initiations

    to come?

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    I wish you so much growth at this time and

    the courage to grow, and the courage to walk

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    through these different thresholds with your

    sense of self in tact, with your connection

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    to your inner voice, and the absolute power

    of the love that is within you and all around

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    you.

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